The Downs of Planning a Wedding...

I've been a bit quiet for the last few days as I had a bit of bad news last week that made me need to get out of the wedding-verse for a little bit. I had planned weeks ago to take my chief bridesmaid (maid of honour) to see my wedding dress as only my parents had seen me in it so far. I was also going to be measured so I could order it as I've only put down a deposit. I had been looking forward to this trip for ages and was so excited for her to see it and we had planned to go shopping and see a movie too and make a girly day out of it.

She came round to my house before we were due to go and told me that she was pregnant and was pulling out of the wedding. Whilst I am really pleased for her as she has been trying for over a year I was so upset because I just couldn't imagine my wedding day without her walking down the aisle with me. I've known since I asked her nearly a year and a half ago that this could be a possibility but she always said she would only pull out if she was going to be heavily pregnant at the time of the wedding. She is due at the beginning of March, seven and a half months before the wedding and said that she was pulling out because she would still be feeding by then. I don't know if I'm being harsh but I don't really understand why she still couldn't be my bridesmaid, ok if she didn't want the responsibility of being chief bridesmaid I could totally understand that but, at the end of the day, I just wanted her to be there with me and would have been quite happy with her having no responsibility at all other than walking down the aisle with me. However, this never came into the conversation as she had already made up her mind and was telling me rather than discussing it with me.

The other thing that really upset me was that she chose to tell me all this on a day that I had been looking forward to for ages and on the day I was supposed to be ordering my dress. She had known for weeks that she was pregnant and had probably made up her mind a while ago that she was pulling out. So I had to spend the whole day putting on a brave face and trying not to cry and being happy for her news. I made it through the shopping and movie but couldn't face going to order my dress so I'm going to go on my own to order it tomorrow as my Mom is away and I now don't have any bridesmaids!!

I don't know who I'm going to ask to be my chief bridesmaid as I've been debating who I was going to chose as my other bridesmaid for ages so now I'm in a total state of indecision! I know that I'll figure it out in the end though and I'll get over losing my best friend from the wedding party but I just wish it didn't hurt so much.

Have you had problems choosing your maids or any wedding issues that have brought you to tears?